Loosing Control
by DevilsTsunami
Summary: Takes Place After Karma Chameleon. Ashley decides to take ecstasy again. 4th Chapter Up!
1. From Prep To Goth

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi,or nothing to do with it. Im just writing a story about it. My first fic..I really HATE Ashley.. I think shes a poser. You don't go from Prep to Goth overnight. I was bored..R+R  
  
The bell rang. Ashley went home.It was a Friday, a nice sunny day. She went straight into her room layed on her bed and cried. She hated her life, her self. She hated everything,8 years, practically all of her life, she was Ms.Perfect. Teacher's pet, she was a good girl. Ashley Kerwin was boring, she had a boyfriend, for over 6 months, had plenty of friends. School President, she had a Mom who loved her, A step- dad who loved her. (I don't know if they're married or anything, but that's how it is in this story lol..just pretend they are) A step-brother who cared for her,Ashley's life was so good. Then..one little pill changed it completely. Lost her friends..Her boyfriend..Everything..All because of the ecstasy she took at a end of the year party she was having..It started off small..Then got bigger.. Then she started counseling..Like that helped..Then first day of school this year, yesterday, she made up with her friends..Then she got asked out on a date..By Sean Cameron..She said yes of course..She liked him..But..she still liked Jimmy..Then when Paige found out..everything changed.. She lost all her friends..again. She came to the conclusion..She was going to try ecstasy again. She knew it could kill her, but she had no friends anyway..She just didn't care. She got up and grabbed her purse. Only her step-brother Toby was home. "Toby i'm going out." Ashley put on her shoes. "Ok I'll be at JT's" Ashley left, as so did Toby. She walked to the hair salon, a block away from her house, right near Degrassi C.S.. She walked in and got taken right away. Her prep days were over. "Short..Really Short..and dye it black." She said in a sad voice. She was on the verge of breaking down in tears again.. "Pull yourself together Kerwin.." she thought.  
  
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Ashley walked out of the salon with short boyish like hair, dyed black. She went home. Her Mom was in the kitchen cutting up vegetables on the counter. "Hi Mom." Ashley was behind her . "Hi As-What did you do with your hair?!" Her Mom was shocked . "I dyed it and got it cut.. I'm over the prep look. Do you think you can take me to the mall?" "Sure. Alone? Why don't you invite one of your friends?" Her Mom asked. "No..I'm going to go alone." Later after dinner, her Mom dropped her off at the mall.  
She went into Hot Topic. She bought boots, and a lot of black clothes. Then walked into any girly store she saw and bought make-up. Then she went into the bathroom in the wall and went into a stall. She opened her purse. Then she opened a small plastic bag, and took out a pill, ecstasy She swallowed it.  
  
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MONDAY: Ashley walked into school. Completely in black. A long-sleeve black shirt on with a black skirt, and long boots. People started looking at her like a freak. "What's with the get-up Ker-loser." Paige and her gang laughed, including Terry. "Your such a jerk Paige" Ashley walked away. She went to her locker. "Hi, Ashley, right?" Ellie said to her. "Yea..And you're Ellie." Ashley smiled.  
  
*************** The end of the first chapter. Its probably boring but just give it a shot. Please R+R 


	2. Side Effects

Disclaimer:I don't own Degrassi..Blah Blah Blah. Second Chapter..I got one review, thats fine for me. The story's probably only going to have about 10 Chapters..Maybe more. I've done some research about ecstasy, aBut enough with the talk...here's the chapter.  
  
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Jimmy walked over to Paige's locker. "So..We still on for tonight?" He asked Paige for dinner and a movie. He liked Paige since grade 7, but he kept quiet about it. "Yea. 7:00, right?" "Yup" Jimmy walked away, but first he gave Paige a kiss on the cheek. He was happy she said yes. He had really liked Ashley, but after what she done, he was through with her. Even though it was the ecstasy, she still kissed HIM. The guy he had got into a fight with...Sean Cameron!And then the nerve of him to ask Ashley out again why, he should bea-- "What am I thinking? It's over with me and her." He thought.  
The bell rang. Everyone at Degrassi Community School went into their classrooms. Ashley, Jimmy, and Paige where all in the same classes. Every single one of them. Ashley was the last one to walk in the classroom. (She wasn't late) There was only one seat left, in the middle of Jimmy and Paige. Ashley took a deep breath and sat down. It was cold out..about 60 degrees, but Ashley was sweating. "Ashley, are you ok?" Ms. Kwan asked. "Yea..I'm fine." Ashley thought she was just getting a cold or something, but she didn't know it was a side effect of ecstasy....  
  
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3:00 P.M The school bell rang. Ashley went outside. She walked a few blocks to a park. Then she walked in a ally-way. There was a dealer there, also he was JT's cousin, Max. (If you remember in the season finale JT got the pill from his cousin,I made up his name) "I need ecstasy." Ashley bought 5 pills, and she used all her money. Money she's been saving since the 5th grade. She put them in her purse and walked away. The 16 year old went home and into her room. She swallowed a pill. Ashley was becomming addicted.  
  
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7:00 P.M. Paige Michalchuk walked into the mall. Jimmy was waiting for her by the entrance. "Hey Paige." "Hey handsome." They kissed for a few seconds. They ate at McDonalds. "He is soo hot" Paige thought. I love him already! After that they went to go see Freddy Vs. Jason. Jimmy put his arm around her. "She must like it..She's not moving my hand!" Jimmy thought. They're date couldn't get any better.  
  
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Ashley's heart was pounding. She was sweating. On her face she had developed a rash that looked like acne. It was a side-effect of ecstasy, just like the other two. If Ashley didn't quit, she could lose her life.  
  
THE END OF CHAPTER 2 ENJOY!! R+R!! 


	3. Hallucination

Disclaimer:Once again I do not own Degrassi im jut writing a--blah blah you probably know that already. 3rd Chapter. 1 Chapter each day.hahaha..here it is.  
  
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8:00 A.M. Tuesday Ashley woke up. It was a nice day today. A little breeze. She got up and went into the bathroom. She had some pimples, or so she thought. She brushed her teeth. Ashley fixed her hair, put her black make-up on,got dressed, the usual. She took ecstasy before she left. "I need it" she thought. Ashley ate breakfeast and went to school. "Hi Ellie..Ohh my god you look so cool. I love your hair!" "Um..Thanks..It's always been like this but ok." Ashley got her books, as so did Ellie, and they walked to class.Ashley had the chills.  
Half hour later.. "OK class, all the Princes were brothers. If they each had 1 sister, how many of Princes and Princess' are there?"They where in Mr.Armstrong's class.Marco Del Rossi raised his hand. "13" he said."Right" He drew 12 stick figures with short hair and all aroow pointed upward and there was a girl stick figure. Ashley looked at the board, then looked again. In the eyes of Ashley, they looked 3D, and were in color. "How'd you do that?!" Ashley asked in amazement.  
"Well I didn't know I was such a good drawer." The bell rang. "OK class for homework tonight you have to do pages 31 and 32." Ashley walked out of the classroom and she fainted. "Oh my god, Ashley?!" Ellie screamed. "Someone get Nurse Henderson" Mr. Armstrong checked her pulse.Ellie went to get the nurse.  
  
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A hour later Ashley woke up in the Nurse's office. "Hi Ashley" Ashley titled her head. "Nurse Henderson?" Her vision was all blurry. "Hi Ashley..You fainted..Your body tempature was very high." He was getting out a thermometor. Paige was walking by the office towards the bathroom. "It was probably from something you ate, or drugs, but we all know you..You're the best student this school has seen in years." he smiled. Paige heard the word "drugs". Her jaw dropped. "Oh my god that freak is on drugs again?! Wait till Hazel hears!" She thought.  
  
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Short chapter...What will happen next? Will the rumor spread? What will Ellie think if she hears? Will Ashley lose her 1 and only friend? Find out next chapter! Da da daaa... 


	4. The Rumor

Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi. Simple. I like the reviews I'm getting! Please keep giving me them! Hehehe it's inspiring! There's only going to be 7 or 8 chapters. I now bring you chapter 4. The Rumor.  
  
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Paige walked into the bathroom and went into a stall. She took out her cell from her purse. She was sending Hazel a text message. "This is to juicy to wait till lunch!" The text read: Ashley's on drugs AGAIN XOXO Paige. She sent it and Hazel got it a few seconds later. The beeping noise was quiet, and they where watching a "Shakespeare masterpiece" as Ms. Kwan would call it. Paige walked into the classroom and took her seat next to Hazel. Hazel Aden gave Paige a "OH MY GOD" look. Paige responded with an "I KNOW!" look. Ashley walked into the classroom, looking wobbly. She handed Ms. Kwan a note. "I'm going home." The teacher nodded. Ashley got her stuff and walked home. She went into her room and looked in the mirror. "I'm so ugly! I hate myself. My life!!" She took out the bag of ecstasy. There were 3 pills left. She got some water and swallowed one of them. She knew what she was doing. She knew she was killing herself. She didn't care. She had nothing to live for. .  
  
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3:00 P.M. "Jimmy, your lame ex is doing drugs again. I hear Nurse Henderson say it." Jimmy didn't know what to say. "Wow...I feel b-" He was cut off by Paige. "Don't feel bad for her. Now its just you and me." She French kissed him. They started making out. They were in the park. "No I can't Paige. I'm sorry. I've liked you since grade 7..But I still have feelings for Ash." He ran out of the park and to her house. He rang the bell. Ashley opened the door. "Jimmy? What do you want?" She said in a perky ditzy airhead not Ash-like type voice. "I love you Ash. Paige told me you are on drugs. They can kill you. Cause brain damage.." "Paige? What does she know? She's just a hag. Go make out with her, she's your sleazy girlfriend!" She slammed the door in his face. It was 80 degrees out. She had 3 layers of blankets on her. Her heart was pounding. Her vision was blurry. She was breaking out in a rash on her face that looked like pimples on her face. They where all side affects of ecstasy. The door opened. Toby was home. "Who's that? Toby??" She was on the couch; she could see him perfectly fine. Normally. But the E was making her vision blurry. "Yea. It's so hot outside, why are you wearing so many blankets?" Toby asked. "I'm sick. Go away." Ashley threw a pillow at him. "Wow I didn't know I couldn't go in my own living room." He went upstairs. Ashley's teeth where clenching. She was going to puke. She ran in the bathroom and threw up. Her heart was beating faster then the wind. She fell asleep in the living room on the couch. She woke up 3 hours later. It was 6:00. Her heart wasn't pounding as fast anymore. The side effects where starting to were off. She was going to keep taking ecstasy. She wanted to die. She wanted her life to end. And if it didn't happen soon, she would get a knife and stab her in her heart. She would commit suicide. She wasn't afraid to.  
  
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End of chapter!! Nice length I think. I enjoy writing the story, so I'll update whenever I get the chance. PLEASE R+R! 


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